"I've been through hell!" Elin breaks her silence on Tiger for the first time

Getty Images

Her divorce is final and she's ready to talk. Elin Nordegren breaks her nine-month silence in an exclusive interview with WHO magazine.

"I have been through the stages of disbelief and shock, to anger and ultimately grief over the loss of the family I so badly wanted for my children," she says in the magazine's latest issue, out just days after her split from Tiger Woods was made official.

The couple tied the knot in October 2004 in Barbados and have 2 children, three-year-old daughter Sam and 19-month-old son Charlie. A 10-minute court hearing in Florida ended their marriage on paper.

Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren's Divorce Is Final

Marriage in Pictures

She was stressed from the lurid tabloid scandal and had insomnia and weight loss. Just days before their divorce was finalised, she also began to lose her hair.

There was initial "shock and disbelief" on learning that her husband had cheated on her. Later, as a string of women claimed affairs with her husband she began to question herself.

"I followed some of it, but not all of it. It was too distressing. I felt stupid – how could I not have known anything?” she said. "The word betrayal isn't strong enough."

Nordegren says she had been truly devoted to Woods and had hoped for a happily-ever-after life together with him.

"I loved him. We had so much fun," she said, "and I felt safe with him."

Getty Images

She also talks about the car crash outside their home and clears the rumours about what happened, "The speculation that I would have used a golf club to hit him is just truly ridiculous."

The decision to seek a divorce was inevitable in the end. "Initially, I thought we had a chance [of saving the marriage]. We tried for months and months... [but] without love and trust [it was impossible]," she says.

"I felt embarrassed for having been so deceived. I will always have a working parenting relationship with Tiger."

The 30-year-old mother of two, who is studying towards a college degree in psychology, says that despite her husband's betrayal, "I also feel stronger than I ever have. I have confidence in my beliefs, my decisions and myself."

In 19 hours over four visits to her Windermere, Fla., rental home, Nordegren shared never-before-seen personal photographs and opened up to WHO about the emotional roller coaster she's been on, her life as a mother to Sam, 3, and Charlie, 19 months, and her hopes for the future.

"My immediate plan is for the kids and me to continue to adjust to our new situation. I am going to keep taking classes, but my main focus is to try to give myself time to heal," she says.

She tells the magazine this was her first – and last – interview, as she intends to remain a private person.

WHO Exclusive

For much more, including exclusive photos of Nordegren at home, pick up the new issue of WHO on newsstands Thursday!