Do you feel like the world is on your shoulders? Like everything at work or at home is your responsibility and things will fall apart if you commit a misstep?

If yes, chances are you’re trying too hard to be Superwoman.

The reality is: much as you’d like to function with above human capabilities, you’re naturally limited --- everyone is.  You only have 24 hours in a day, you need at least 8 hours of sleep, and from time to time, you have to invest in “me” time. Besides, what’s the use of accomplishing so many things if they all just leave you drained and depressed?

Everyone deserves to find the right balance of work and play to keep the mind engaged and content. Consider the following tips on how you can make the leap from being everything to everyone, to feeling incredibly blessed (and blissed out) in life.

How to Make the Shift from Superwoman to Super-happy

1.    Accept that you can’t control everything.

The easiest path to burn-out and depression is to believe that we can influence everything happening around us. Yes, it’s important to be proactive and move things, but it’s equally important to give up when something is unfixable or not in your power to change. You can never control other people’s reactions, for example, you can only influence them. Sometimes the market brings bad news along with the good. Learn the art of rolling with the punches and moving on. When you think everything is controllable, it’s easy to blame yourself when things go wrong --- a habit that will bring you nothing but needless guilt!

2.    Believe that others can also do the job right.

One of the most common symptoms of the Superwoman syndrome is a tendency to hoard work because you don’t think anyone else can meet your standards. Ever taken over a child’s efforts to dress himself up because he’s too slow? Ever held back from delegating because an employee has a different approach to tackling a project? If the answer is yes, then you could be needlessly punishing yourself by taking on things others can easily do. It’s alright to aim for excellence, but perfectionism is a waste of life!

The thing is: the more you distrust others ability to do a job right, the more likely your fears will become a self-fulfilling prophecy. How can your children learn if you don’t give then any responsibility? How can you develop a functional team if you don’t delegate? You have to accept that people won’t always measure up at first, but with continuous feedback, they can eventually learn.

3.    Know that there’s nothing wrong with showing weakness.

Even Superman is weakened by Kryptonite, so why do you expect yourself to be a pillar of strength in every domain? An important part of being human is the need to cry and scream “stop!” once in a while. When you attempt to carry all burdens, cope with anything, and juggle everything—all you’re really doing is hiding under a facade of strength.

And it makes your life a hell of a lot harder than it needs to be.

Learn how to be true to yourself. Feelings are morally neutral; it doesn’t make you a bad person if you feel sad, angry or frail sometimes. In fact, if you just survived a difficult situation, feeling this way is normal. Give others the opportunity to support you; it doesn’t always have to be you doing the helping. The more authentic you are to how you really feel, the closer you’ll get to experiencing Super-happy. 

4.    Remind yourself that it’s not a crime to take care of yourself.

More often than not, superwomen are guilt into thinking it’s selfish to want to take care of one’s self. Perhaps the family income is limited, and splurging on a massage or a spa seems impractical. Or maybe other members of the family are going through illness or depression, which forces you to adopt a sombre mood all the time. Whatever the reason why you feel guilty about taking care of yourself, you have to release it.

Instead, make it a priority to pencil in activities to help you become a happier person. Make sure that at least once a week you meet with your friends. Challenge yourself with new endeavours on a regular basis. And yes, get that foot rub any opportunity you can!

5.    Lastly, remember that life is not a race.

If your boss preaches to either compete or die, then perhaps it’s time to look for a new job or take a risk to work for yourself.  One of the reasons why many successful people are unhappy is because they know that being on top comes with a price --- a lifetime of stepping on people’s toes, outdoing the competition and basically being crowned winner of the rat race. But know that there are many ways to get a sense of achievement, and you can be successful even if you approach life at a more leisurely pace. As the old cliché goes, people work too hard to earn enough money to relax, when they could just choose to relax in the first place! Take time to smell the roses, or even grow your own roses --- you’ll live a richer life as a result.

Author of De-stress Your Success: Get More of What You Want with Less Time, Stress and Effort, Sacha Crouch is a business, executive and life coach, who helps people create the work and lives they love. For other free lifestyle resources visit www.activ8change.com.au and www.de-stressyoursuccess.com