How to tell in three minutes whether the next guy you meet is worth more of your time… or not



One hundred and eighty seconds. That’s all you need to determine how a relationship will progress, according to a recent study by University of Minnesota Duluth, US. Chemistry kicks in even before you speak with someone, which should help you distinguish the decent guy from the dodgy one across a crowded bar, gym or fruit and veg shop. And when two people click, the interaction escalates rapidly because both parties offer more personal information and ask more questions. Here, experts fine-tune your man-dar so you’ll know almost immediately if you should proceed, or lose him.


Listen to his body talk.
“Even unattractive men who present themselves as confident can be sexy and appealing,” says Dr Ann Demarais, co-author of First Impressions: What You Don’t Know About How Others See You ($14.99, Bantam Books). Green lights: his hips are directed towards you, he’s leaning in slightly, his arms are uncrossed, and he’s relaxed.


Go with your gut.
“Jump in, then take a break and reflect,” suggests psychologist Dr Frank Bernieri. But don’t overthink it: if you walk away from your encounter in a better mood, you’ve clicked. (Hopefully you exchanged numbers.)


Beware of wolves.
If he claims to feel an instant connection, take a giant step back, warns Sandra Brown, author of How to Spot a Dangerous Man Before You Get Involved ($24.95, Hunter House). This bloke probably wants intimacy – the one that involves KY, not D&Ms.


Avoid lecturers.
If he pontificates or talks only about himself, that may be all he wants to talk about. “He thinks he’s smart and interesting, but he’s actually tedious and self-absorbed,” says Dr Demarais.


Like the one who likes you.
The guy who can deliver a genuine compliment is worth a follow-up. How to tell it’s not from a repertoire of pick-up lines? He’ll praise a specific feature, which shows he took the time to notice your contagious laugh or stand-out cheekbones.