No, dimethicone and cyclomethicone aren't muscle-bound babes from Gladiators. They're just two of the many unpronounceable words you'll find on most shampoo labels. Here's what they all do:

Water
Usually the first item on a shampoo label, water is the base that keeps the other ingredients flowing. It accounts for up to 80 per cent of what's in the bottle.

Ammonium lauryl sulfate/ammonium laureth sulfate/sodium lauryl sulfate
These surfactants - basically, a fancy word for detergents - are the muscles that do all the cleaning.

Cocamide DEA, MEA or TEA/Cocamidopropyl betaine
These milder foaming detergents are added to create suds. But they also moisturise and thicken the formula so the shampoo is easier to pour.

Sodium citrate
This buffering agent keeps the shampoo at the proper pH level (slightly acidic) as you wash. OK, now in plain English: SC allows dirt and oil to wash off and helps cuticles (the overlapping scales on each strand) lie flat so hair looks smooth and shiny.

Glycol distearate/stearate
These waxes are kind of like hunky Swedish masseurs: primarily there for look and feel. They're what gives the formula a pearly sheen and allows it to flow easily from the bottle.

Polyquaternium/quaternium
These softening compounds - also found in some fabric softeners - thicken shampoos and condition hair.

Dimethicone/cyclomethicone
Silicone oils that coat and smooth down the cuticles to add thickness, reduce static and provide shine. Oh, yeah: they also make combing easier. If you have coarse, curly or damaged hair, make sure your shampoo contains one of these conditioning ingredients.

Panthenol
A form of vitamin B, this hard-working humectant (that's a substance that helps hair attract and retain moisture) works inside and out: it penetrates the hair cuticle to plump it up and coats it for added shine.

Cetyl/oleyl/stearyl alcohol
Seeing the word alcohol may set off an alarm (Drying! Bad!). Not to worry: These are hydrating alcohols that attach themselves to the outside of the hair shaft and act as lubricants. Result: combs effortlessly glide through hair.

Nut oils/shea butter
These are super-rich natural moisturisers found in hydrating shampoos that coat cuticles so water stays locked inside.

Ascorbic acid/citric acid
Natural acids derived from vitamin C that smooth cuticles and add shine.

Octyl salicylate/PABA
Sunscreens added to protect your scalp and hair from nasty, chaos-causing UV rays - so your colour lasts longer (yay!).