Sex & Relationships

Realise her fantasy

Jun 16 09:00am

Just like you, she’s harbouring some sexual thoughts she’s dying to share. Sharing’s caring, right? Our poll of 10,000 people revealed that men and women have the same top-five sexual fantasies. Here’s what she wants, why she wants it and how to make it happen . . . for both of you.

Her top 5 fantasies:

1. Show time

80% want to touch themselves while you watch (and learn)

The turn-on
“The fast that she’s turning you on while making herself orgasm makes her feel sexy,” explains sexologist Dr Sandor Gardos.

Make it happen
During foreplay, take her hand and gently move it towards her clitoris. Remove your hand and encourage her to continue while you ravish the rest of her body. Then ease away and enjoy the show or Service yourself at the same time, suggests Gardos. She’ll love it.


2. Dominate her
66% want you to cuff them
74% want to be spanked during sex
63% want you to pull their hair during sex

The turn-on
Society encourages a woman to see herself as an object of desire; being restrained and spanked allows her to act that out, says Dr Carol Queen, author of Exhibitionism for the Shy (amazon.com, $33).
Bonus: a sharp spank on her bum can stimulate nerve endings in her vagina.

Make it happen
Duringa playful make-out session , gently grab her wrists and pin them above her head, says sex therapist Dr Ava Cadell. Use your free hand to explore her body. Next, bind her wrists with a rope of paper towel (knowing it’s breakable is reassuring for first-timers).


3. Public notice
51% want to join the mile high club with you
64% want to have sex with you in a public place
43% want to have a secret sex encounter in your office

The turn-on
“The fear of being caught really heightens your senses, allowing you to focus on the sexual experience,” explains Queen.

Make it happen
If you have a window in the bedroom, start by leaving the curtains open or getting raunchy in the backyard, this will ease you both into it.


4. Set in motion
40% are ready to make a sex DVD with you
72% want to watch porn with you

The turn-on
A Stanford university study found that women reach peak arousal just two minutes into an erotic flick. 40 percent of the women polled admitted to watching porn or visiting erotic Web sites when they’re home alone.

Make it happen
Don’t start with hard-core titles, cautions Dr Victoria Zdrok, sex therapist and former Playmate of the Year. Choose one together and hop online for a session.


5. Third element
25% want a threesome with you and another woman
81% want you to use sex toys on them
47% want to visit a strip club with you

The turn-on
“She wants to fulfil your fantasy,” says Gardos. “And, more important, the more stimuli, the better the orgasm.” An Australian study found that a chorus of oral, manual and genital intercourse increases her chances of a mind-blowing orgasm by 89 per cent.

Make it happen
Create a threesome fantasy using sex toys first. Then visit a strip club together. If you both like watching each other enjoying lap dances, then discuss the next level. “But voice any misgivings,” warns Cadell, “ or you may ruin a lifelong relationship.

7 Comments Report Abuse
1. tashi.james - Jun 18 08:49pm
she'd probably prefer to use sex toys on me.

on the other hand she comes 99% of the time and loves giving me fellatio so I can't complain
2. ndrtaesta - Jul 10 09:02pm
i do agree but the last fantasie is just wierd...women are not like that...they're so complicated and paranoid..they would not cope with their boyfriend watchin a hot chick getting naked while dancin..anyway,they do love sex toys..women are just like men and i can tell:they go wild easily
3. burnie_guy - Jul 12 07:05am
Since I have been single my eyes have been opened to what women actually want. And 3somes with 2 men and sex with a woman are high on a lot of womens lists. Note that is not all women.
4. leonmackie - Jul 16 06:16pm
"on the other hand she comes 99% of the time and loves giving me fellatio so I can't complain"

tashi.james – you're a tosser. Talk it up a little more.
5. donna_boyd75 - Aug 19 11:06pm
women can become great at faking it, but if you truly want to please her take note of what she is doing to you. "Most" women do to their guys as they want done to themselves, men are just to stupid to pick it up.
6. happyfungreat - Aug 20 08:31am
Whats wrong with asking ??? Gee we are not mind readers everyones different and you have to keep an open mind and be flexible if something isn't to your taste explain why to your partner and if you need something special ASK !!! its all about communication !
7. wonderingcobra - Sep 12 01:34pm
I must admit watching my wife play with herself is a real turn on. I also love her to watch me masturbate and of course the best is to watch her hand sliding up and down on me
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